So, okay—maybe the linkage of mellow and aging seems like a stretch to some of us in the "autumn" phase of life, given the (bleep!) we have to deal with now and then. Maybe you even feel that way yourself. If so, perhaps you might consider the parallel between our lives and those of developing wines, for we too can add complexity as we age.
However, such morphing does seem to proceed more easily in the company of purpose, exploration/adventure, and the critical ingredient: fun! Without those or other enhancements, our lives can sometimes feel decidedly Un-mellow—particularly during the downturns, when our "grand adventure" may seem more like cut-throat poker with the Fates.
Do you find yourself in that game occasionally? That's when it can be particularly important to remind yourself of the destinations still awaiting you, the people who'd love to see you, and the (metaphorical) hills hoping to feel your boots.
Because...if not now, when? If not you, who? As you go eyeball-to-eyeball with these considerations, here are a few suggestions:
* Get as clear as possible about what YOU genuinely want (or perhaps need) to accomplish.
* If you then need to tweak your circumstances a bit, lay out a plausible course of action.
* Take a single step toward the goal(s), and then just keep going at a pace that works for you.
* Do your best to stay out of the Boxes.
In a nutshell, those would be attitudes, beliefs, habits, etc., that hinder our progress and/or lessen our enjoyment of life. Although they do this at any age, such "boxes" can become particularly troublesome in our later years. For example, the don't-get-old box may lead us to overly heed such counsel as this: *Ten things no woman should do/wear after 50/60/70. *Seven make-up blunders women make as they age. *Staying sexually attractive after 65: How realistic is it? *Looking old can sometimes be bad for your health. *Five ways not to look like a scary hag during your senior years...
Sure, I made the last one up, but messages like these are all over the place. Even when offered in a helpful spirit, such material reinforces the tedious message that we tend to diminish in the eyes of society as the years pass. (In case we hadn't noticed that ourselves now and then, right?) Do we really need downers like that when we're trying to have a good time and/or get things done? Not hardly.
Instead, why not trash rigid and ageist rules concerning wearing apparel, or hair styles and makeup, or what some consider "appropriate" for women of a certain age to be, do, or have? As grownups, we are more than capable of making our own choices, creating our own style (among other things), and having a blast besides.
Another treacherous box? Try procrastination, the do-it-later box. This one we'd all be wise to stay clear of, for it is The Box from Hell. Plus, the more years we accumulate, the more potentially destructive it becomes, if we allow it to deflect us from the things we want or from those things we may really, really need to take care of (and possibly feel guilty about not having done so previously).
When allowed, as dampening to the spirit can be the not-enough box, the maybe-losing-it box (yuuge!), the too-late/old boxes, the don't/can't/shouldn't do it boxes, the maybe I'll need/want this later (clutter) box—to
name but a few of the usual suspects.
Click on any live link below for discussions about managing these and other impediments to the laid-back, jolly, and fulfilling autumn years you're now enjoying or may wish to create/maintain for yourself:
Whether or not the box analogy works for you doesn't matter. The behavioral and thought patterns such "boxes" represent, however, could hinder you unnecessarily and perhaps also more than you realize. But if you stay alert, you can often blow right past those draggers—freeing yourself to make the days and years at your disposal both mellow and productive, whether step by step or in leaps that might startle even you.
In the game of Life, we tend to fare better (IMHO) when we go for the gusto. Plus, the world needs our experience, wisdom, and humor now more than ever, so why hang back? (Yes, I'm talking to you.) Instead, help us all by hanging In with your best game...and getting some jollies while you do it!
PS: If your particular "game" involves something you want or need to do,
even a single step counts. Maybe take one today?