Okay, so "mellow" in connection with aging might seem like a stretch...as you navigate, possibly kicking and screaming, this phase of your life. (Or, if not actually kicking and screaming, not in the best of humor either.) But what if we seasoned women took more seriously the parallel between our own lives and a developing wine, for we too become more complex with age when we allow ourselves to do so.
One way we do that is by bringing plenty of fun into our lives, along with purpose and exploration and/or adventure...FPE for short, okay? Deprived of those, however, our mellowness tends to wear thinner as the years pass.
In fact, it can become positively threadbare during the hard times when Life starts feeling more like cut-throat poker with the Fates than anything else. Perhaps you've been there and felt that yourself, maybe more than once, so you know all too well what I'm talking about.
Whether or not you're in that "game" right now, you owe it to yourself (IMHO) to keep going for the FPE. As you do, though, watch out for the "boxes" that tend to snare the unwary in various ways. Here are some examples of what I mean...
Among other things, the don't-get-old box encourages us to overly heed such counsel as this: Ten things no woman should do/wear after 50/60. Seven make-up mistakes women make as they age. Staying sexually attractive after 65: How realistic is it? Looking old can sometimes be bad for your health. Five ways not to look like a scary hag during your senior years...
Sure, I made the last one up, but messages of this nature abound. Even when offered in a helpful spirit, such material reinforces the tedious message that we often diminish in the eyes of society as the years pass (just in case we hadn't noticed that ourselves). Do we really need these reminders when we're trying to have a good time?
Instead, why not flush rigid and ageist rules concerning wearing apparel, or hair styles and makeup, or what's "appropriate" for a woman of a certain age to be, do, or have? We're grownups entitled to make our own choices and create our own style (among other things)...and to have a blast besides.
Another treacherous box? Try procrastination, the do-it-later box. Please stay out of this one as much as you can, for it is a Box from Hell. Plus, the more years we accumulate, the more potentially destructive it becomes if we allow it to deflect us from the things we want or that we perhaps really, really need to do.
When allowed, as dampening to the spirit can be the not-enough box, the maybe-losing-it box (yuuge!), the too-late/old boxes, the don't/can't/shouldn't do it boxes, the maybe I'll need/want this later (clutter) box—to
name but a few of the usual suspects.
Click on any live link below for discussions about managing these and other impediments to the laid-back, jolly, and fulfilling autumn years you're now enjoying or may wish to create/maintain for yourself:
Whether or not the box analogy works for you doesn't matter. The behaviors and thought patterns such "boxes" represent, however, could hinder you unnecessarily. But if you stay alert, you can often blow past those draggers—freeing yourself to make the days and years at your disposal both mellow and productive, whether step by step or in leaps that might startle even you.
So, whatever your age, why not keep going for the gusto? Isn't it hugely more fun to whoop it up, whatever that entails for you, than to mope around? Plus, the world needs your experience, wisdom, and plain old guts now more than ever, foxy lady. You can help us all by hanging in with your best game and also by staying mellow with FPE!
PS: If your particular "game" involves something you want or need to do,
even a single step counts. Maybe take one today?