Aging Mellow
   So, if wines do it...

Why not aging women, as wellwomen like some of us, for example, who are experiencing the passage of time "up-close and personal." And what's in it for us? Perhaps a kinder world, as mellower people often seem thoughtful of others. Another plus would be quicker/easier sidelining of bullies trying to rain out our personal parades (see "Boxes" below).

Getting There

Ah, but how do we actually attain mellowness? In many and varied ways, it seems. For example, some routes may include a particular mission or purpose: giving to others, securing finances, tackling a compelling goal/dream, etc. In fact, when engaging in such activities, we may also notice an uptick in our overall interest in life (and enjoyment thereof), as this "aging woman" can attest.

Maybe we also take a hard look at the level of exploration, creativity, adventure, and Flat-Out Fun in our lives. As those four tend to wander when we're busy, stressed, terminally bored, dueling with the Fates, etc., some oversight and even direct measures may help us keep them at home or reel them back when they do stray.

   A Few "Measures" to Consider...

During challenging and/or tedious times, many find it helpful to talk with people who understand how to listen. For example, conversations with a sensitive friend/family member or a therapist, clergyperson, coach, etc., can sometimes yield surprising benefits.

Another possibility? Life-tweaks, which could include even very simple adjustments
to enhance and/or lure back joie de vivre or sort out an issue that may be troubling you. A single step, even just one, can often start the ball rolling, whatever the nature and scope of the "tweak" you're undertaking.

Here's another: Could you be harboring a long-held wish or goala personal path/hill awaiting your metaphorical boots? If yes, perhaps you and those boots might decide to embark upon any of the four possibilities below:

* Getting very, very clear about what YOU genuinely want for yourself, or possibly really need to do
* Laying out a plausible course of action to attain/accomplish that thing
* Taking a single step toward the goal(s), and then moving ahead and hanging in
* Doing your best to stay out of the Boxes as you go

   Boxes??  

Alas, yes. In a nutshell, those would be attitudes, beliefs, habits, etcetera: the bullies hindering our progress and/or lessening our enjoyment of life. Such "boxes" tend to lean in obnoxiously during the autumn (i.e., aging) years.

For example, the don't-get-old box can assault midlife and senior women in remarkably tiresome ways.
Another candidate for rotten eggs? Procrastination, the do-it-later box, which deflects us from pursuing the things we want. It can also block us from things we may Really need to take care of and perhaps also feel guilty about not having done before now. (Guess how I know this.)

As dampening to the spirit can be the maybe-losing-it box, the too-late/old boxes, the don't/can't/shouldn't do it (the DDIs) boxes, and the maybe I'll need/want this later (clutter) boxto name but a few of the usual suspects.

           Click on any live link below for discussions about these and other bandits.

                                Acing the Aging Gig

Whether or not the box analogy works for you doesn't really matter (IMHO). But the behavioral and thought patterns such "boxes" represent might sometimes hinder you unnecessarily and possibly also more than you realize. Plus, they can sure trash mellow.

Something else to (pleeez) consider is that today's world SO needs your experience, wisdom, and good humor. Although we could certainly argue that you do not "owe" those qualities to the world, what a gift they can be if you apply them generously. And as those gifts enrich whomever they touch, they'll be enriching you as well in the givingsurely one of Life's greater Double-Wins. Ready to go for it???

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If you choose to explore this site, please understand two things: (a) I am neither therapist nor coach; (b) my comments here are not meant to disparage any women whose immediate choices may range from limited to nonexistent. To such women (or anyone, really), I mean no offense with my remarks.


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