So okay, maybe the linkage of mellow and aging seems like a stretch to some of us in the "autumn" phase of life—and perhaps a longish one as well. I get that. But consider the parallel between our own lives and those of developing wines: we too often add layers of complexity as we age.
Such morphing takes place more readily, though, when we can bring fun, purpose, and exploration/adventure (FPE) into our lives. With too few of those "enhancements," our mellowness may retain a weaker toehold and also wear thinner over the years.
In fact, it could feel positively threadbare during hard times, when perhaps life seems more like cut-throat poker with the Fates than anything else. Been there and done that? Then you likely know what I'm talking about.
What better reason(s) to Keep Going for your own FPE, because you probably still have places to go, people to see, and maybe a hill or two yet to climb. And if not now, when? If not you, who? In fact, might this be a good time to get waaay more serious about your "bucket list" than perhaps you've felt able to be in the past?
If so, here are three suggestions to consider:
* Get very clear about what you genuinely want or need to accomplish.
* Plan a (flexible) course of action.
* Take a single step toward the goal, and then just keep going at a pace that works for you.
Although unhelpful attitudes, beliefs, habits, etc., can hinder our progress and/or lessen our enjoyment of life at any age, such "boxes" can become particularly troublesome in later years. For example, the don't-get-old box may lead us to overly heed such counsel as this: Ten things no woman should do/wear after 50/60/70. Seven make-up blunders women make as they age. Staying sexually attractive after 65: How realistic is it? Looking old can sometimes be bad for your health. Five ways not to look like a scary hag during your senior years...
Sure, I made the last one up, but messages like these are all over the place. Even when offered in a helpful spirit, such material reinforces the tedious message that we often diminish in the eyes of society as the years pass. (In case we hadn't noticed that ourselves now and then.) Do we really need downers like that when we're trying to have a good time and/or get things done? Not hardly (IMHO).
Instead, why not trash rigid and ageist rules concerning wearing apparel, or hair styles and makeup, or what's "appropriate" for women of a certain age to be, do, or have? As "grownups," we're more than capable of making our own choices and creating our own style (among other things)...and having a blast besides.
Another treacherous box? Try procrastination, the do-it-later box and one we'd all be wise to stay clear of, for it is a Box from Hell. Plus, the more years we accumulate, the more potentially destructive it becomes if we allow it to deflect us from the things we want or from those things we may really, really need to take care of (and possibly feel guilty about not having done so previously).
When allowed, as dampening to the spirit can be the not-enough box, the maybe-losing-it box (yuuge!), the too-late/old boxes, the don't/can't/shouldn't do it boxes, the maybe I'll need/want this later (clutter) box—to
name but a few of the usual suspects.
Click on any live link below for discussions about managing these and other impediments to the laid-back, jolly, and fulfilling autumn years you're now enjoying or may wish to create/maintain for yourself:
Whether or not the box analogy works for you doesn't matter. The behavioral and thought patterns such "boxes" represent, however, could hinder you unnecessarily (and perhaps also more than you realize). But if you stay alert, you can often blow right past those draggers—freeing yourself to make the days and years at your disposal both mellow and productive, whether step by step or in leaps that might startle even you.
So, whatever your age, why not keep going for the gusto? Isn't it hugely more fun to whoop it up than to mope around? Plus, the world needs your experience, wisdom, and plain old guts now more than ever, foxy lady. You can help us all by hanging in with your best game and also by staying mellow with FPE.
PS: If your particular "game" involves something you want or need to do,
even a single step counts. Maybe take one today?