Aging Mellow...
Could that work for you?

So, okaymaybe the linkage of mellow and aging seems like a stretch to some of us in the "autumn" phase of life, given the (bleep!) we have to deal with now and then. Maybe you even feel that way yourself. If so, perhaps you might take a moment to consider the parallel between our lives and those of developing wines, for we too often add complexity as we age.

Although sometimes hard won, it's complexity all the same...which often leads to a certain mellowness of outlook. And, as you've perhaps noted yourself, such morphing thrives in the company of purpose, exploration/adventure, and the critical ingredient: fun

Without those or other enhancements, our lives may feel decidedly Un-mellow at times, such as when our "grand adventure" seems more like cut-throat poker with the Fates. 

When playing that game yourself, you might find it useful to focus upon the destinations still awaiting you and the metaphorical or physical hills still hoping to feel your boots. After all, if not now, when? If not you, who? 

So a suggestion: even if circumstances are constraining you at the moment, you also might give thought to the following actions:

* Getting as clear as possible about what YOU genuinely want (or perhaps need) to accomplish
* Laying out a plausible course of action (if you want to tweak your circumstances a bit)
* Taking a single step toward the goal(s), and then just keep going at a pace that works for You
* Doing your best to stay out of the Boxes

"Boxes?" What Boxes? 

In a nutshell, those would be attitudes, beliefs, habits, etc., that hinder our progress and/or lessen our enjoyment of life. Although they do this at any age, such "boxes" can become particularly troublesome in our later years. For example, the don't-get-old box may lead us to overly heed such counsel as this: *Ten things no woman should do/wear after 50/60/70. *Seven make-up blunders women make as they age. *Staying sexually attractive after 65: How realistic is it? *Looking old can sometimes be bad for your health. *Five ways not to look like a scary hag during your senior years...

Sure, I made the last one up, but messages like these are all over the place. Even when offered in a helpful spirit, such material reinforces the tedious message that we tend to diminish in the eyes of society as the years pass. (In case we hadn't noticed that ourselves now and then, right?) Do we really need downers like that when we're trying to have a good time and/or get things done? Not hardly.

Instead, why not trash rigid and ageist rules concerning wearing apparel, or hair styles and makeup, or what some consider "appropriate" for women of a certain age to be, do, or have? As grownups, we are more than capable of making our own choices, creating our own style (among other things), and having a blast besides. 

  Other Boxes to Avoid

Another treacherous box? Try procrastination, the do-it-later box. This one we'd all be wise to stay clear of, for it is The Box from Hell. Plus, the more years we accumulate, the more potentially destructive it becomes, if we allow it to deflect us from the things we want or from those things we may really, really need to take care of (and possibly feel guilty about not having done so previously). 

When allowed, as dampening to the spirit can be the not-enough box, the maybe-losing-it box (yuuge!), the too-late/old boxes, the don't/can't/shouldn't do it boxes, the maybe I'll need/want this later (clutter) boxto name but a few of the usual suspects.

Click on any live link below for discussions about managing these and other impediments to the laid-back, jolly, and fulfilling autumn years you're now enjoying or may wish to create/maintain for yourself:

Do it later
Make it better (and better and better)
Don’t/Can’t/Shouldn’t do it
All or nothing
Don’t have enough…
Too old/too late to…

  Bottom Line?

Whether or not the box analogy works for you doesn't matter. The behavioral and thought patterns such "boxes" represent, however, could hinder you unnecessarily and perhaps also more than you realize. But if you stay alert, you can often blow right past those draggersfreeing yourself to make the days and years at your disposal both mellow and productive, whether step by step or in leaps that might startle even you. 

In the Game of Life, I believe we generally fare better when we go for the gusto. Plus, the world needs our experience, wisdom, and humor now more than why hang back? (Yes, I'm talking to you.) Instead, help us all by hanging In with your best game and getting some serious jollies while you do it! 

PS: If your particular "game" involves something you want or need to do,
a single step
counts. Maybe take one today?

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